Dollar General

Dollar General. I actually despise the store. It isn’t that I don’t like dollar stores. It’s that this store seems to be the ghetto of all dollar stores. For some reason to me the floors are always sticky and they smell like feet. I even think that the deals aren’t even good. They just trick by having rounded numbers instead of the .99 or .59 etc. So instead of 3.98 for a box of cheerios you’ll pay 4. Seems better for some reason. I’m sure it has to do with simplicity for their sort of clientele. I remember discussing with someone the possibility of moving out into the middle of know where with someone who actually lived out in the same area. She said that that Dollar General would come in handy. NEVER I thought. I would rather just do without then enter that store, and what could I possibly need that they might have. When the Dollar General opened in Bertram, I wondered how long it was going to take before it started to smell or stick. How long do they last as a new store before they become what we all know as the ghetto way to spend a buck. Well that thing was sure popular. Cars were in and out all day long. It was sprawling with Bertram’s finest. It wasn’t long before I had to eat my words. Yes, that dreaded Dollar General became very convenient. I stopped in their for medicine, butter or brown sugar. Even ice cream on occasions. One day in particular I was making chicken and rice, except I was missing the rice ingredient. So on a rainy day I pulled on my sweat pants, my uggs and a big black jacket. I ran in there as fast as I possibly could, with my big black jacket and hood pulled over my head close to my eyes. It is as if I am afraid that some satellite somewhere will pick me up entering the store and broadcast it so that all can see and laugh at me. After I hopped out of my car and enter the store, which was of course busy. A young man turned around from the chip aisle. I am not totally foreign to this, remember I do have all my teeth, but I was trying to hide in my big black jacket so I was slightly surprised. Then as I browsed the plethora of rice options. (I’m kidding) The kid walked passed my aisle twice in both directions. I didn’t really think anything of it, until as I went to leave the store and drive out on the highway back to my safe haven he rolled down the window and asked for my number. As I go to flash my left hand, I realize that in the process of making meatloaf for tomorrow’s dinner (I often make two at once) I have left it on the kitchen counter. So, as I flash my empty left hand I realize that I now look like the idiot in the oversized coat and simply laugh at the turn of events and speed off in the opposite direction. Nothing really gets more redneck then going to the Dollar General to pick up chicks. J